I’m excited that this is the day we kick off the new series: Marriage Monday, @ Home Wednesday, Faith Filled Friday & DIY Saturday!
There are now also sub-categories of each of the four above so that it is easier to go back and find what you are looking for. I’m so excited, let’s get started! 🙂
Today is a Marriage Monday, and I’m actually going to talk about something that happened just last night!
If you couldn’t tell from the title, today’s post is about extending grace to your spouse and instead of jumping on them for something that went awry – extending them grace instead.
Okay, here goes ………
It was late last night and I was trying to use the last five lemons on the kitchen island because they would soon go bad if I didn’t use them.
I absolutely love lemon water at home – I drink some soon after I wake up, during the middle of the day and once before bed. I don’t have to think about doing it – I do it like clockwork.
Getting a small cutting board and knife, I started cutting the lemons in half, one by one.
Then, I took the knife and tried to get all the seeds I could see out of the lemon halves and threw them in the trashcan.
I continued by squeezing the lemon halves into a cute little measuring bowl by none other than the Pioneer Woman (just as a note – I am crazy in love with anything and everything Ree Drummond puts out! 😉 )and it came out to be almost a full cup of lemon juice by the time I was done.
Before I poured the pure lemon juice into a newly opened jug of water I had just gotten out of the pantry, I stopped to clean up any mess I had made and also noticed that there were some seeds in the measuring cup.
Enter Samuel, my sweet Hubby.
Now, a side note about my Husband – he is very intelligent and is honestly one of the smartest people I know and I respect this very much.
Because of this, he’s always trying to figure out how to reinvent something or use a tool you normally wouldn’t use to get a job, whatever that may be, done better.
Enter the coffee filter, who’s white little self my dear Hubby selected as one of those tools you normally wouldn’t use to filter lemon juice into the gallon jug of water.
You see where this is going, don’t you? 😉
The coffee filter was used like a cone and inserted about an inch into the jug opening, and I start to pour the lemon juice in. I’m so excited about this, and I’m imagining how wonderful a cup of cold, lemony water is going to be in the morning and the week to come!
Maybe I started to get excited a bit too soon – the coffee filter did not filter the lemon juice at all!
It started filling up before I could stop pouring, it started to overflow all over my hands and then proceeded to erupt all over the counter, the floor and both of us!
I now had two choices to make, both out of emotions –
- Get mad because now not only did I not have lemon water, but it was also a completely sticky mess e v e r y w h e r e.
- Extend my Hubby grace, because he did not know that it wouldn’t work. It was a completely honest mistake made by a human being who was already tired, sore and had a terrible backache.
I chose to go with emotion 2, and extend grace and patience.
Sometimes this isn’t an easy thing to do at all, extending grace can sometimes go completely against how we feel at the moment of emotion, but we have to keep this in check.
….. and grace for grace. John 1:16
Just like giving kindness and receiving kindness, the same goes for extending grace to our spouse, or anyone else for that matter.
If we extend grace, God will extend it back to us through Himself and also other people.
You know in Proverbs 18:24 where we are taught about showing ourselves friendly to make friends? Extending grace works the exact same way!
And it is especially important to extend grace to the spouse that we stood at an alter with and made a sacred vow to God over – wouldn’t you agree?
As we stood there at the kitchen island, squirted with lemon juice and standing in a puddle of it to boot, I knew that he was sorry and also aggravated at himself.
What did I do?
I smiled at him, giggled because this whole scenario was hilarious to look at, told him it was okay, and hugged him – lemon juice soaked and all.
Now wasn’t that a much sweeter moment instead of throwing an attitude, saying hurtful things and going to bed grumpy?
I think people nowadays would be much happier if they took control of their emotions, with Gods help, and didn’t let setbacks or change effect their attitude. It’s sad that it’s now the norm to just lash out because you don’t like something or something that happened, instead of going to God with it first.
Do I always have the perfect attitude? No. Do I get grumpy? Yes. Have I ever been in a foul mood and said things I shouldn’t have? You bet.
But I’ve also asked God for forgiveness every single time, and then went to the person and apologized face to face.
You see, extending grace takes a lot of will.
It’s not something that is necessarily easy to do, and sometimes this can be even harder to do for your spouse.
But at the same time it’s harder to do, it’s also completely vital to extend grace to your spouse!
There are countless times that Samuel has extended me grace, deservedly or not, and been the bigger person between the two of us on certain occasions.
I’m definitely not an expert on marriage, but I’ve learned so much about this special journey over the last months that seem to be some of the “keys” to a Godly marriage that I can’t help but share them!
As for the lemon water, well, we cleaned the mess up together and went to bed, happy and contented – I’ll have to go to the store and get a new bag of lemons, slice them in half, squeeze them into that pretty measuring cup and pour it into that gallon jug of water.
This time, though, I won’t have a coffee filter anywhere in sight 😉
XOXO -Autumn Renae